I really feel like a Jody slave right now. I sit here and wait on my next task to be given to be by mi mister and nothing else seems to matter. Meanwhile the fury is building and building and building. Does he really even see me as a person or am I like the crutch that he calls and whatever he wants he gets. Here it is a holiday and first thing he does is go work on his project. As he does every other day that he is off from his reg govt job. I mean I was in the mindset before that he was just doing it all the time so that he could get it done and then not worry about it. Now its starting to fester in the gray matter that even after its done he will still come up with things to keep between he us. Jesus is this all in my mind. I just need to go and get help.
If I sit in this house and stare at the walls and wait for someone to want to be out and having fun with me I think I may start to scream. Fuck it all really. Single life was so much less complicated and fun.

Soooo...Yeah

Well its been a while and its been up and down, up and down, up and down.  I am so sick from the ebb and flow of my life right now. Dealing with someone betraying you and all their flaws along with all yours is very tiring. It seems though I am the only one of the unit that wants to deal with anything.  Jesus I hate people that wine and I am starting to hate myself because I am becoming that chick.
Why have I let my life turn into this steaming pile of void? Blah, Blah, Blah......I've become boredom.  Well fuck that....time to take it back. On the real.....I'm tired of staring at the walls waiting on someone to realize my worth. Tired of being a slave to a man that will not appreciate the little things (and the HUGE blaring ones) that I constantly do for him. Mostly I am tired of passing the same fucking cow pasture everyday on my way to the house....I hate the country!  Hahahhahah!
BCF

Musings and Observations .....Yeah or something like that.

9:00pm........ Cheaters are the scum of the earth. Dealing with one and the aftermath should earn ever man and woman that has had to endure it a spot in heaven. No really it should.  The gaul some people have to do that to another person is just .....Urgh! I see why people snap and kill their significant others.  My best girl homie says that I should run out on him and do it myself. Nah that's a negative.com I would never do that to anyone no matter what. Its stupid and just beneath me. 

Final thought on it??  Cheaters are assholes.  Yeah that should be a T-shirt.

BCF