TBC Take 6 and shove it.

12:04am...............Friday morning and I have no class today and I am more than grateful for that.  My mind is bogged down with math and anatomical models.  Its still stuck in translation mode from the African professor with 6 degrees one a medical mind you, and the lecture that was the beginning of the end.  I am enjoying going to class though.  I love being back in school I just want so badly to do well, extremely well for my guy.  I mean he is footing the bill totally out of pocket.  If I don't get A's I will feel guilty as hell. 

That is issue one......the second and the one that persists is the fact that he thinks I am disgustingly fat.  "I want you to work on getting a body that we can both love"  his words.  Welcome home eating disorder.  I over think every single thing that I eat now.  Every minute of my day is a question of is he watching me eat, Is he looking at my stomach, Who is he texting now, which one.  Jezz i am so screwed up. 

TBCF - Skool Again

1:45pm.................   So today I registered for school.  *listens for applause*  *crickets* Well no I didn't exoect fanfare but maybe a "go on girl"  (*lol as in In Living Color skit from the 90's*).  Anyway, I've already been to college one time around and have a degree that has done abso nothing for me.  Now I decide to go at this again.  Older and scared isn't really summing this up right.  I am terrified.  Math???  Omg the Dragon that will slay me.  Yep Algebra.  I think this is payback for all the times I said..."Its only one semester I wont ever need this again."

Yeah the placement test sid yeah you need it again.  What the hell am I doing???

BC